BIG BEAR, "Doin' Thangs" (1998)

You can't talk hideous album covers without giving twisted props to Doin' Thangs. People might not remember names, but rest assured, "that album with the blinged-out bears" cannot be forgotten.

Doin' Thangs isn't the worst Pen 'n' Pixel cover since, if nothing else, it delivers the ideal amount of absurdity. Big Bear is shown, alongside other big bears, doin' thangs. Sittin', chillin', snackin' on nuts and berries, sippin' Cristal, puffin' non-chocolate cigars. The genius of the cover is that it leaves me wanting more. I want to see Big Bear hanging out in the woods, grabbing fish from the river and climbing a tree.

Instead, I'll listen to him rap.

"Intro"--Shout out to those what made the Big Bear dream come true.

"No Lies"--Big Bear as a rapper is capable and amiable. I could say the same for his beat selection: melodic, bass-heavy, room temp.

"Doin' Thangs"--Big Bear is proudly "southern fried," because Nebraska's the South, totally. Ah well, some thangs--devouring chicken fingers, downing six packs, blowing blunts--can't be contained to just one region.

Vocal swagger BB has in spades. Lyrical agility, eeehhhh.

"Goin' through shit like I'm an anus."

"This click's harder than dicks."

Damnit, Big Bear! Both those atrocities were in verse one, though. There are two more to come, in which he acquits himself, especially at the start of the second:

"I'm guess I'm just talented
To even survive through all the fakery
And mockery of haters tryna sucker me
I'm sucker free"

"Heaven Or Hell"--Languorous Shakurian lament.

"Money An' Fame"--"Bland an' inoffensive," she sneered, to the amusement of no one else.

"What'cha Workin' Wit'"--Luniz on the assist? And you played them this chopstick-ass beat? I guess cash and weed makes even bear crap smell like fudge.

"The Realist"--You doubt Big Bear? His management company is OSO Fo Real Entertainment.

Hardest beat yet, with interesting instrumentation. The 11 x 11 Boys mean-mug and smash fists to palms. Can't deny the energy, even if I've listened to the song three times now and couldn't quote one line under threat of death.

"No Where To Run"--I'm genuinely surprised at how well-done the album is. Nothing beyond the cover qualifies as outstanding--for the era, the region, or the genre in general--but I am digging the way Big Bear rides beats, especially the one for "No Where To Run," which I'd call "funkacholic"--funky and melancholic.

"Player Hatas"--"I'm in the Bahamas swimmin' naked." Oso, no.

Self-fulfilling prophecy rap can be quite bittersweet.

"Hoes Is Scared"--Produced by O'Dell from Beats By the Pound. (I knew No Limit had some involvement with this.) Nice up-tempo track for BB to rock that K-Mart pimp hat.

"All Sides"--Viciously rigid.

"Ain't No Love"--No guff taken. Good thing, since the haters are multitudinous. And possibly imaginary.

"No Matter What"--The Big Bear brand could have been a joy to behold. Food Channel show called Cookin' Thangs. Street basketball league named Ballin' Thangs. A gun range named Shootin' Thangs. And of course his own record label, Rappin' Thangs.

Don't forget the self-produced, straight-to-DVD street film: Doin' Thangs: The Movie.

"No Hope"--Ode to "the hurt sisters," and an apology for the foul ways of man. Don't sweat it, Big Bear.

"Chop It Up"--Smooth as buttercream posse cut teeming with gangsta lean.

"Be Real"--Lawn chair pimping. How ya gonna yell at a bitch to have your money lest hell rain down when you're holding a Dixie cup?

"Outro"--Big Bear and some cubs talkin' thangs.



Doin' Thangs is the best of the ten albums I reviewed for this series. And it's not actually that good. Just kinda average. Still, I was surprised that it even reached that  height.