Thursday, February 26, 2009

Last Night's Top Chef Finale Was....

Completely, utterly, disgustingly meh.

Carla--How the hell do you let your bum-ass sous chef (who choked so spectacularly in the Season 3 finale that the best thing she presented all night was made by Howie "Sweat Lord" Kleinberg) talk you out of a kick-ass menu? If you don't know how to sous vide, don't do it! You rule at tarts, make tarts. Casey Thompson, you were out of line opening your mouth, you clearly don't understand the true purpose of a sous chef. Don't show up in DC. Ever. You know who pays triple at Ben's Chili Bowl? You, bitch.

Stefan--It should have been your title, and you got outcooked. What the freak. Though by the wacky Fin not winning, Season 4 chef Stephanie Izard still has the most total main competition wins (5) and the most impressive show resume by a TC champ.

The Guy Who Won--I know your name. Congrats on being the most hated winner since Season 2, and the most mediocre chef to ever win (1 individual challenge win?) And it's already being figured out that sous chef Richard Blais was largely responsible for your dishes--so much for that "I made my food" comment. Assclown.

Edited to add Casey's classy response:

Carla was not prepared and in over her head. The show did not talk about how the first course (crab) took her half of the friggin’ cooking time that day, I was left to work the rest of HER dishes.

She also did not have a plan. The ONLY thing she had in mind was a cheese course! I would NEVER do a cheese course. And where in the hell did french come from!? She is not even classically trained! It (the show) didn’t talk about how I worked on a sauce for 2 days and Carla forgot to put it on the plate… It didn’t show how the 2nd course (fish) was MINE. It didn’t show how she took the sous vide idea and decided to GRILL it last minute causing it to be tough… And it didn’t show how she WANTED to do the souffles which she does not even know how to make! That was HER food, because it certainly was me asking her how she wanted to do this and that while she was busy picking crab the entire time and making a souffle that didn’t rise!

I am done with TC. I did not influence her. She has NO ideas of her own, oh, except a cheese course.

What a cunt!

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