Friday, September 14, 2007

I Can't Believe This Year's Top Chef May Be a Woman Who Makes Love to Onions

Casey Thompson has pissed me off in so many special ways on this season of Top Chef: Miami. From haughtily explaining the amuse bouche to her suspicious knack for befriending superior competitors who are eliminated not long after their BFF status is established (two so far; one more and Casey's an FBI-certified serial killer!), from somehow managing to turn the spotlight onto herself when another chef is sent home ("The very talented and inspiring chef Lia is going home! Look at me, I'm so sad and yet somehow so pretty!"), to dropping ebonics in the kitchen and who can forget the relay race--


Add in her dual resemblances to Jennifer Aniston and Ann Coulter and, well, you have a reality show villain for the ages. The Subtly Annoying Bitch.

She has won two consecutive challenges now and been rewarded with a Macintosh laptop and two business class tickets to anywhere Continental Airlines flies. Whereas Sara Mair won the "Restaurant Wars" a few weeks back for leading a team that included a sweaty chef with a head fulla titanium and a hyperactive jerkass to victory while making what looked to a be a lovely halibut, and received a hearty "wow, you excelled without falling back on your specialty, cheese!". Actually, she didn't even receive that.

Casey is looking like (read: being edited to look like) one of the two finalists. This cannot stand. I am not obligated to root for a woman as Top Chef if she happens to rub me as a self-pitying attention whore who stumbled into some decent dishes recently. Neither of her wins have been decisive to this viewers mental palatte; dare I say, her most recent win for a veal and cauliflower airplane dinner was a flat-out affront. Hung's Chilean sea bass looked much more appetizing. And who the hell eats cauliflower on a plane?

And speaking of Hung...it's almost certain that he'll make it to the top 2. The entire season I have alternately loathed/tolerated this maddening little spark plug of self-ascribed awesomeness as he's performed under expectation yet always had the good fortune to be around other chefs who fucked it up even worse. The very real possibility of a Hung/Casey final means I may very well have to root for this douchesack. (Spell check be damned, that's one word in my book.)

All this angst towards the ascension of a woman who should have been gone 5 episodes into this season, when her Texas native self made undercooked chicken dressed with castor oil in a Latin food competition while a chef with no Latin experience made a merely "bland" trout-on-polenta dish and got sent home. I'm not going to accuse the Bravo network of rigging the competition, easy as it would be to do. Just how nice for their show to have its first-ever female champion. A female who looks like a Friend and thus appeals to a large segment of the viewership. Just sayin'.

Hung for the win, huh?



I am so with you, Lia.

3 comments:

  1. well it is interesting when the whole thing of CJ's brocolini comes out that he was forced to send it out, where as Howie did what he did but i guess he was expected to go out

    and there is a hypocritical sense in the fact that the judges say he shouldn't sent it out, yet he said "production" told him to send it out

    if Casey wins, i think bravo will be lost to you, and Tim Gunn was so hoping you'd give him a chance

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  2. Well, the thing bout that is, CJ sends out an incomplete dish to the judges and...? Howie got reamed for that by Bourdain very first ep and was only saved by the facts of his risotto being good and his ability to quote from Bourdain's own book. At this stage, I think a missing component would have sealed CJ's doom anyway.

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  3. true, but it would have been a slightly less bitter nail in his coffin since it was the "worst dish in the history of the show", and i mean Brian's was pretty bad, so you never know, although refusing productions would probably influence the judges

    and as an aside, while Lia and Peppermint Patty may be kindred souls, atleast Lia a english lit major (more then i can say, i can't read) and enjoys unique creative foods, such as a jelly bean, popcorn and toast thanksgiving, although much more high scale version

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